Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

It is always advisable to enjoy a few lighthearted moments in life. Here are a few funny quotes and sayings that you can enjoy.
Quotabulary Staff
Last Updated: Dec 10, 2017
Everyone needs a dose of laughter to make their day wonderful. These funny quotes are not only full of humor, but also contain wit. You can print your favorite ones for a poster or save it as a desktop screensaver. Laughter is the best way to beat stress and overcome gloom. Spend some time reading these funny quotes and sayings, and you will surely have a better day.
Funny Random Sayings
It's better to be looked over, than overlooked. ~ Mae West
It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job: it's a depression when you lose yours. ~ Harry S. Truman
Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell, the name will carry. ~ Bill Cosby
Gentlemen. You can't fight in here. This is the War Room. ~ President Merkin Muffley (Peter Sellers) in 'Dr. Strangelove'
Men are like steel; both are worthless when they lose their temper. ~ Unknown
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'. ~ Homer Simpson
Silence is golden but duct tape is silver. ~ Anonymous
No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you. ~ Sholom Aleichem
Life is like an onion. Why is life like an onion? Because you peel away layer after layer and when you come to the end you have nothing. ~ Yiddish Proverb
My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other. ~ Josh Billings
Funny Quotes about Love
The truth behind being in love is that one needs to take it with a pinch of salt and a dash of lemon. All those scorned in love, or those who are celebrating love, will enjoy the following funny love quotes and sayings:
The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. ~ Oscar Wilde
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is. ~ Unknown
Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener! ~ Unknown
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. ~ Albert Einstein
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx
I was nauseous and tingly all over... I was either in love or I had smallpox. ~ Woody Allen
silver Duct Tape
Businessman cheer on top of stairs, someone falling down
two Businessmen fighting
father yelling on daughter
LOTR plot Monsters Inc
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